It Is Never Too Late to Provide a Meaningful Life When There Are Special Needs

By Karen Kaplan, MS

As I was finishing up my special breakfast at a nearby café, a couple walked in, thinking it might be too late for breakfast, and asked the owner if they could order their special, huevos rancheros. The owner, quickly confirmed, “It is never too late for huevos rancheros.” There was a huge smile on the customers face, and I giggled.

I have always felt that it is never too late for many things, especially helping children and adults develop skills of daily living, communication, understanding, social skills and so much more. It is said that the brain never stops learning due to neuroplasticity. It is always changing, adapting, and forming new neural connections, throughout an individual’s life. The key, however, is to continue engaging in new and challenging activities. Engaging in these activities forces our brain to think and learn. So on-going practice in activities helps keep our brain healthy.

So, parents, grandparents, teachers, and therapists, please do not stop expecting those who we have identified as lower cognitive or having profound challenges to engage in meaningful and new activities. When care providers, teachers, therapists, para professionals think and do and problem solve for those they supervise, they deny them the right to build more capacity in their lives. Sitting in front of screens all day, does not expand the brain’s capacity. It may keep them quiet. It may lessen your load. But it does not help them build brain capacity. Never leaving a home or classroom, does not expand anyone’s skill development or emotional well-being. It may however increase their fear of change.

I recently connected to a young man, who attended my residential school from age 5 to 22. He was not considered severe on the autism spectrum, and by age 22, he rode a bike, swam, and roller-skated. He went everywhere in the community, even to a Kings Basketball game; he dressed himself, bathed with some additional prompting, set the table, cleared it, and did the dishes. He washed his laundry with some limited support and completed all hygiene tasks with minimal prompting. He signed and could shake his head yes and no to obtained needs.

But when I saw him today, now in his 40’s, he was overweight from the lack of exercise and community access. He isn’t asked to participate in his daily household tasks and sits all day long holding a basketball to comfort him. The look on his face is now vacant. No one in his environment signs or expects him to communicate his needs and wants. This is what can happen when we stop expecting or requiring or encouraging. He was unfortunately placed in an adult program that expects nothing from him.

Please remember that it is never too late for huevos rancheros. Let that phrase be a reminder to keep exposing those with special needs to meaningful activities, engaging them in all their daily life activities, encouraging, and building on some type of communication style (verbal, signing, spelling, pictures, gestures). Provide them with community engagement activities (shopping, gyms, concerts, museums, parks, sports, libraries, laundry mats, bus rides, biking, camping, movies).

For those who are uncertain about a program's potential to further cognitive development, it is important to advocate for individuals and support their participation. Contribute actively to every Individual Education Plan, Individual Transition Plan, and Individual Program Plan.

Ensure that objectives are systematically documented across all relevant domains, including self-help, daily living skills, personal hygiene, socialization, hobbies, expressive and receptive communication, cognitive abilities, community engagement, pre-vocational and vocational skills, fine motor skills, motor planning, and sensory regulation.

Keep in mind that it is never too late to order huevos rancheros.

Karen Kaplan, MS, is a native San Franciscan. She completed her bachelor’s and master’s degrees at Arizona State University, Tempe, Arizona, in speech pathology and audiology. She minored in special education and obtained her speech therapist and special education credentials in California. Karen worked as a speech therapist for schools for 20 years before opening her own residential and education program for students with autism. She worked in credential programs at Sacramento State University as well as UC Davis and spent 20 years directing private schools for those with autism and similar learning challenges.

Karen founded a non-profit, Offerings, which helps cultures globally to understand those with developmental challenges. For seven years, she founded and facilitated an autism lecture series and resource fair in Northern California. Karen still facilitates an annual Autism Awesomeness event. She is currently consulting, helping families, schools, and centers for children, teens, and adults. Karen has authored three books: Reach Me Teach Me: A Public School Program for the Autistic Child; A Handbook for Teachers and Administrators, On the Yellow Brick Road: My Search for Home and Hope for the Child with Autism, and Typewriting to Heaven… and Back: Conversations with My Dad on Death, Afterlife and Living  (which is not about autism but about having important conversations with those we love).

www.karenkaplanasd.com