So Many Life Lessons to Learn: A Checklist for the Exceptional Parent

By Karen Kaplan, MS

As we grow up, we learn so much through observation, paying attention, listening, and watching our parents, teachers, and friends, who help us manage our daily lives. Today, I wondered how those with exceptional needs, who have attention differences, cognitive differences, or different social awareness, learn what many of us learn so easily.

I urge you, parents, to ensure your child acquires these skills. You will need to help them develop observation, attention, safety, and meaningful social skills. You will need to model them, point them out, teach them, and explain to them many times to ensure they acquire those independent living skills.

Here are some questions you might ask yourself to help you develop a plan to help them:

• Do they see cracks in glassware and know not to drink out of cracked glass?

• Do they see chips in ceramic cups, bowls, and plates and know to avoid them when eating?

• Do they notice zippers that are broken, tears and rips, and missing buttons on the clothing they are about to put on? Do they understand that those details might be important in making a good presentation out in their community or at school, in terms of how they look?

• Do they notice an uneven pavement as they are walking or crossing a street and know how to avoid or carefully move on it?

• Are they aware of the temperature of their shower, bath, or dishwashing water so they do not burn themselves while completing independent living tasks?

• Do they understand how hot tea or coffee drinks vary in heat and know how to check the temperature before taking a mouthful of those liquids? Have you taught them safety around BBQ equipment or campfires?

• Do they have stove, oven, and toaster safety learning?

• Do they understand the importance of unplugging a lamp before changing a bulb?

• Have you given them swimming lessons so they can be safe in the swimming pool, the river, or the ocean?

• Have you helped them understand that they should approach a dog with caution?

• Do they know how to ask the owner if the dog is kind and welcoming? Do they know how to touch the dog?

We learn so many lessons as we grow. Be sure to help them learn those lessons as well.

Karen Kaplan, MS, is a native San Franciscan. She completed her bachelor’s and master’s degrees at Arizona State University, Tempe, Arizona, in speech pathology and audiology. She minored in special education and obtained her speech therapist and special education credentials in California. Karen worked as a speech therapist for schools for 20 years before opening her own residential and education program for students with autism. She worked in credential programs at Sacramento State University as well as UC Davis and spent 20 years directing private schools for those with autism and similar learning challenges. Karen founded a non-profit, Offerings, which helps cultures globally to understand those with developmental challenges. For seven years, she founded and facilitated an autism lecture series and resource fair in Northern California. Karen still facilitates an annual Autism Awesomeness event. She is currently consulting, helping families, schools, and centers for children, teens, and adults. Karen has authored three books: Reach Me Teach Me: A Public School Program for the Autistic Child; A Handbook for Teachers and Administrators, On the Yellow Brick Road: My Search for Home and Hope for the Child with Autism, and Typewriting to Heaven… and Back: Conversations with My Dad on Death, Afterlife and Living (which is not about autism but about having important conversations with those we love).

Website: www.karenkaplanasd.com