Helping a Loved One with Special Needs Write the Chapters of Their Life

By Karen Kaplan, MS

Our lives are often described as books with many chapters. Each chapter is believed to explore a different phase or period in our lives. So, if someone with special needs were to create their book of life, what would they write as its title? Would it be 'My Life Counts'? Maybe the title would be, 'More Like You Than You Think.' What might each chapter reveal? Perhaps parents and teachers could help their students and children write those chapters, guiding them to reflect on their past, engage with their present, and envision their future potential.

Starting their own story can begin with a simple art project where the teacher or parent spreads out large sheets of butcher paper, has the child lie on their back, and traces their body outline. Then, the teacher helps them add details like eyes, nose, hair, and clothing. This initial activity helps them identify their eye color, hair color, the number of feet and hands they have, and perhaps even how tall they are. Take a look at How to Do Body Tracing for Kids. Chapter one might be titled "This is Me."

The next chapter could be titled: “This is My Family.” To create this chapter, you might teach them how to take pictures of their family, upload them, print them out, cut them out, and glue them into this chapter. Then, they might write their names under each picture. They could note who the mother, father, sister, brother, aunt, uncle, cousins, or grandparents are. Take a look at: Scrapbook visual craftivity-The Autism Helper. You might then help them start writing this chapter, using something like, "I would like you to meet my family. I have a mom, a dad, and a brother. My brother’s name is _____, and he is ____ years old. He likes to ride bikes."

The next chapter might be titled, “This is Where I Live & Go to School.” This allows parents to teach mapping skills, both at home, in the neighborhood, and in the larger community. Teachers could focus on mapping the classroom and school grounds. Knowing where services and resources are located within the school helps boost independence and problem-solving skills.

Parents, take your children on walks and point out landmarks in the community. This activity is helpful. Taking pictures of those landmarks for this new chapter can be enjoyable. Drawing a map of the home could be interesting, and then asking them to identify items that belong in each room can improve problem-solving, fine motor skills, and communication skills. Take a look at Make map skills relevant to students · Mrs. P's Specialties.

Now, the next chapter, “What I Enjoy Doing & Hope to Do,” might highlight all current interests and enthusiasm while sharing hopeful dreams for the future. Teachers can help students list their interests and then share them with classmates. This encourages social skills and conversation. Parents should ensure this chapter reflects those interests. Take pictures of them engaging in their current hobbies. They can include these on the pages, glue a picture of themselves, or even draw them into the chapter. Then, ask what they hope to do in the future. Have them look up pictures of those activities and add them to this chapter. Autism and Special Interests: Empowering Parents' Guide.

The next chapter title might be, “How I Became Independent.” This chapter can be written before becoming independent. For individuals with special needs, encouraging and developing independent skills should start early. Here is a list of meaningful skills to teach them, along with taking pictures of them as they master these critical skills:

• All hygiene skills (hair, teeth, deodorant, bathing, shaving).

• Dressing and undressing skills.

• Communication skills (words, phrases, sentences, making choices, following directions, questions, AAC devices, phone, email).

• All home care and maintenance skills (even changing a light bulb).

• Laundry skills.

• Dishwashing and drying skills.

• Making and stripping a bed.

• Community safety skills, such as street crossing, public transportation, and using community resources (fire department, police department, library, stores, laundry, restaurants, hospital).

• Meal planning, shopping, and putting all items away.

• Taking the garbage out on pick-up day.

• Scheduling doctor, dental, and hair appointments.

• Money awareness, budgeting, banking, and saving skills.

• Gardening.

• Social skills (conversations, asking for help, play, sharing, thank you cards, holiday events).

• Media safety (Facebook, Instagram, websites, chat rooms, dating sites).

  
  

A final chapter might be titled, “How I Found Purpose.” This chapter could explore how they discovered employment, volunteer work, friendships, or a unique career path. Parents and teachers, it starts with all of you encouraging, not limiting, their exposure. Help them stay curious. I know a young man who loved making biscotti, and he now does so in a small community kitchen, selling those tasty treats to bed & breakfast spots. I know another young man, on the spectrum, who has his own website, finding vintage games for others. There is a coffee shop in the US now creating jobs for those with Down syndrome to run. I know parents who helped their son start a car-washing business because he loved the details of it. automobiles. I also know a young girl who loved stringing beads together and has an online jewelry shop.

Make sure to follow and develop interests. Curiosity sparks interests, which can lead to social connections, volunteer work, and jobs. Interests also open pathways to post-secondary education. For example, science might be an interest, and pursuing higher education in the sciences could lead to research or careers in biology. Building things could lead to careers in architecture or construction. Those interested in visual games might become programmers. If you're interested in dogs, you might consider dog walking or grooming.

In this chapter, encourage them to intentionally participate in a variety of activities such as art, music, museums, camps, community services, and volunteering, and take photos of their involvement. Include those pictures in this chapter and have them write about which ones they enjoyed the most. If they are non-verbal, simply get a photo of them smiling with a thumbs-up. Continue adding activities and motivate them to explore life's opportunities.

Everyone documents their life in some way. Some people need assistance in developing those stories. Be someone who helps. Offer exposure and encouragement. Think possible. Think capable. Help them see opportunities. Help them develop hope and courage as they write the chapters of their lives.

Karen Kaplan, MS, is a native San Franciscan. She completed her bachelor’s and master’s degrees at Arizona State University, Tempe, Arizona, in speech pathology and audiology. She minored in special education and obtained her speech therapist and special education credentials in California. Karen worked as a speech therapist for schools for 20 years before opening her own residential and education program for students with autism. She worked in credential programs at Sacramento State University as well as UC Davis and spent 20 years directing private schools for those with autism and similar learning challenges.